I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize