I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
