I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
