Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
