I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
you would pick up someone in the library
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Another day, another engagement, another cat
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
