I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
