you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
