I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize