just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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