Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
