hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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