Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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