If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
