well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
