The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Brb crying the tears of my youth
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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