Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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