don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
