oh god the rape fog is back!
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Randomize