he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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