You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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