i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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