I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
