it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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