i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
