JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize