Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
