Sacagawea was the original milf.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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