just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
