you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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