The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
