grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
