im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize