ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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