Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
