is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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