my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
stop calling my apartment porn island.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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