Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
