if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
