Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize