sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize