I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
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