if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
