Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
