Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Who died my cat blue again?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize