We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
