I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
