Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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