therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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