piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
