I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize
