ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
